No One But You
by lupinsstar
Summary: OneShot song fic. The Doctor's thoughts after loosing Rose. Doomsday Spoilers


A/N: firstly, sorry. I moan myself about the amount of depressive fics, and here I am writing one! but I was listening to the song and it felt like a perfect song to do a song fic to. Now, I don't tend to write song fics so apologies if it's not that great. But please read and review.

Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who. Unfortunately that belongs to the BBC. Nor do I own the song "No-one But You" by Queen. Although I do own a Queen c.d. with the song on it…does that count?

The Doctor sat in the TARDIS, miserable. He had just been to the service in honour of everyone who had died because of the Daleks and Cybermen. He had gone to honour Rose. She had not died, he knew that, but to him, she may as well had, as he knew that even he could not see her again. Thus fact tore him apart inside. He was nothing without her.

_A hand above the water  
An angel reaching for the sky_

Rose was his. His bright angel, sent to relieve him of the pain he suffered after the Time War. She had helped him move on, helped him rediscover what life was about. Without her, he had no purpose. He had a Time Machine, but no one who he could share the Universe with. He wondered how she was. Did she miss him, the way he missed her? Did she cry every day, finding that nothing could ever be the same?

_Is it raining in heaven -  
Do you want us to cry?_

His heart was truly broken. He wasn't the only one. at the service, everyone had cried. Their loved ones lost at the hands of war on Earth. All those people, suffering. And all they wanted was to be back with the people they had lost. For the others, the people they lost had died. The Doctor had just one comfort. He knew that Rose was alive, and he had said goodbye.

_And everywhere the broken-hearted  
On every lonely avenue  
No-one could reach them  
No-one but you_

All those people. Some young, some old. Mothers, Fathers, Brothers and Sisters. Families torn apart. The Doctor felt torn apart. He had lost the one woman he had ever loved. And he didn't even get the chance to tell her.

_One by one  
Only the good die young_

Rose was so young, and he took her away from her family. He put her through so much, and she never doubted him, never stopped loving him. She was officially dead back on her Earth. The place he couldn't bring himself to go to. The memorial had been months ago, and since then the TARDIS had been flying through the vortex. He couldn't bring himself to land, solve any problems. Run away from monsters. Not without Rose. His Rose…

_They're only flying too close to the sun_

He thought back to the day he had found her, when they met in Bad Wolf Bay. He had burnt up a sun just to say goodbye. That showed his love. He couldn't leave without saying goodbye. He couldn't do that to Rose.

_And life goes on -  
Without you..._

But as they say, life goes on. He knew that Rose would hate to see him like this. So full of misery, yet so empty inside. Thinking about Rose, though, was exactly what he needed to do. He knew her inside out. They were best friends, she loved him, and he loved her. And they had always known that love was there. Even Jackie and Mickey had sensed it, in the end. He understood that Rose would have wanted him to miss her, to mourn her; however, he also knew that Rose would be trying to start a new life. She wouldn't forget him, not ever. Nor would he forget her, he would remember her by doing what she had loved best. Getting out there, living life.

_Another tricky situation  
A get to drowin' in the blues_

So there he was, stuck in a bad situation. He missed Rose when things like this came up. So as he sat in his cell, the guards glaring at this stranger who had not even done much; just visited the rose garden on Kra. They had beautiful roses there. He remembered taking Rose there once. She had marvelled at the roses, and he had picked her one. It was still in her room on the TARDIS.

_And i find myself thinkin'  
Well - what would you do?_

He thought hard, they had been in a similar situation that day too. The roses of Kra were sacred, but then again, so was his Rose. All he had wanted was to feel close to her again. So he thought back as to how they had gotten out of that situation. A tear fell down his face as he remembered Rose telling the guard that she was a rose. A spirit of a sacred rose, in a human form. They had certainly been released then.

_Yes! - it was such an operation  
Forever paying every due_

And now he was paying the price for his loss. He was trapped. Not just in a cell. He was trapped inside. His world had begun and ended with Rose. Dully, he told the guards about her. About his Rose, and how she brought life to him. how she filled the gap he had in his soul. He told them how much he loved her, and how devastated he was that he never got to tell her. He cried for her, knowing Rose would not want this, but still the tears fell.

_Hell, you made a sensation  
You found a way through – and_

She had got inside of him, reached out and found what was missing. She filled it. A stupid ape had been the one to find him. She broke down his barriers, but did not run at what she found; a broken man, suffering the loss of everything he ever had. Instead she had got rid of that feeling, and filled his heart with love again.

_One by one  
Only the good die young_

So he was empty again. The gap that Rose had filled was once again there. He had lost her. They should have been together forever. He should have been the one falling, not her. He was getting too old now. Too old to suffer so much. Jackie had been right about him to begin with. He should have never taken Rose on his travels with him. she was only 19 years old when he met her. Young, carefree, fun. She had a boyfriend and a life. And he took her away from all that.

_They're only flyin' too close to the sun  
We'll remember -  
Forever..._

He would never ever forget Rose. How could he? That would be like setting down on a planet, getting a house with doors and windows. Impossible. Seeing Rose again was impossible, unless the breach opened again. Although, if this happened, there would be every possibility he wouldn't see Rose anyway. Or if he did, she would be dead.

_And now the party must be over  
I guess we'll never understand  
The sense of your leaving  
Was it the way it was planned?_

He didn't know why Rose had to leave him. It wasn't fair. He had loved Rose more than life itself. But the fates had taken her away from him. he hadn't understood why the lever had moved that fateful day in Torchwood Tower. They had successfully over-ridded the system. The levers should have stayed put. If only it had, if only…

_And so we grace another table  
And raise our glasses one more time_

Plenty of "if only's..." filled his mind. If only Rose had managed to hold on. If only the breach hadn't sealed before she could teleport back. If only he had had enough time to say those three little words…

And as he sat back in the TARDIS, on Rose's bed, breathing her in. he remembered her, all, the good memories. The times she had helped him, when he had helped her… She had been so accepting after his regeneration. She was willing to die for him, to do anything to ensure his safety. Those feelings had certainly been the same towards her. He gave his life to save her. If only he could do that again.

_There's a face at the window  
And i ain't never, never sayin' goodbye..._

He walked softly out of her room, closed the door, and sealed it shut with his sonic screwdriver. As he did so, he vowed that he would get back to her one day. He vowed that when he had said goodbye to her, that would not be the end, but for now, at least, he had said goodbye. The lock clicked shut, and he walked away from her room. 

_One by one  
Only the good die young  
They're only flyin' too close to the sun_

Rose wasn't dead, just gone. But she would never truly be gone. The Doctor could see this now. She would always be a part of him, just like he would always be a part of her. It would hurt less and less, over time, thinking about her. He would remember her, and remember the love he felt. So he cried one last time.

_Cryin' for nothing  
Cryin' for no-one  
No-one but you_

He cried for her, he cried for what could have been, and then he cried no more. But he knew that he could never love anyone quite like he had loved Rose. In his heart there was no-one but her.

So that's it. Hope you enjoyed it. Reviews appreciated and much loved! And again, sorry about adding to the angst fics, but like I said, I was listening to the song, and it felt right. xxx


End file.
